Home Again

The best moment of the last two weeks was undoubtedly putting my key in the lock of the front door, flinging it open... and finding everything exactly as it should be.

I loved being in Victoria with our families and adored the opportunities we had to catch up with people and revisit places from our childhood. Christmas was especially amazing, as the boys are still filled with wonder at its magic. They are very good at living in the here and now and it is easy to get caught up in their excitement as they embrace each moment.

Yes, our time away was wonderful. But we were anxious to be home.

We left early this morning, hoping to be home just after lunch. It was a catastrophic fire day, over 40 degrees with howling northerly winds. Even with the air conditioner on, the car was hot. We were still two hours from home when Xavier was car sick for the first time. It was excruciating trying to clean him up by the side of the road in the heat and the wind but we managed. And we kept going, deciding not to eat on the road, but to come home immediately.

And how special it was to come home to find no disaster had befallen it, that everything was clean and tidy and in its place. My fish were all still alive and hurried to the front of the tank, where they have been staring at me ever since. I wonder how quiet and still the house was to them!

The boys wasted no time in playing the keyboard and pulling out their old games. And their new games too. We read books, played Uno Attack and made slushies with our new Christmas present. There was even time for some shopping to restock the pantry.

Home again.

Best of all, we are just in time to see out a year that has not been kind to us. I realise that the worst has not befallen us, that we are a long way from the rock bottom that so many others in our world endure, but this is easily the most difficult year we have faced.

After seven years, this is the year we finally unclenched our fists to find our dreams had fallen to dust in our grasp. There were no diamonds there, just ashes.

We have been rebuilding now for five months. The turn of the new year fills me with hope and I try to forget the other times that I have hoped and wished on the new year.

2011 will be our year.